Paint Me Like Your Ex: A Breakup Diary

A story of heartbreak, haircuts, and hotness. Note to self: You weren’t dumped. You were reborn.

Jul 03, 2025, 12:00 PM

ENTRY 01 — The Breakup

He said, “It’s not you, it’s me.”
 It’s definitely him.
 One minute he’s my soulmate, the next he’s a lesson with commitment issues and now I am spilaring on my own bathroom floor.

ENTRY 02 — Cry in Bed Couture

It’s giving “I haven’t left my bed in 72 hours” chic.
 It's 4:07 AM. Lana’s playing. My dignity is not.
 Is this heartbreak or just very curated suffering?

ENTRY 03 — The Haircut

I asked for “just a trim.” 
Walked out with a bob and a new identity.
 My ex never saw my breakdown coming, but my hairstylist? She felt it

ENTRY 04 — The Delusional Queen

3 selfies. 2 thirst traps. 1 quote: “You’ll regret this.”
 He muted me. But his best friend didn’t. 
Healing? Not yet. Entertaining? Very.

ENTRY 05 — The Revenge Fit

They said dress for the job you want.
 I dressed to haunt his memories.
 No closure. Just couture.
 My dress is tight. My standards? Tighter.

ENTRY 06 — Closure (a scam)

I typed a novel.
Deleted it. Sent: “Hope you’re doing well :)” 
What I meant: “I hope your charger stops working in bed.”

ENTRY 07 — Rebirth

Hair: new. Mood: expensive. 
I’m softer now. But hotter.
 From sad girl to savage with really good skincare.
 He lost me. But I? Found SPF, journaling, and inner peace (on sale).