Bollywood’s middle-aged men are laying thirst traps that are borderline illegal
This isn't a snack, it's a goddamn feast
We’re calling bullshit on the mid-life crisis. That period in a man’s life where he’s supposed to get a red sports car because he’s ageing isn’t a thing. And it’s definitely not a crisis. If science (Read: Instagram) is anything to go by, there’s a whole generation of Bollywood men only getting better in their middle age.
Does this look like a crisis to you?
Don’t look at it. It’s a trap. A thirst trap. Here’s something to quench that thirst:
Psyche. That was another trap designed to drain the moisture from your skin to keep these men looking evergreen. There’s no other explanation as to how these men have managed to get sexier with age. Unless their blood is wine. And if so, it’s clear that Dino Morea’s cup runneth over.
While millennials have spent the last year debating whether dad-bod is a thing to justify their excessive salted chip intake, these men have been laying thirst traps all over the internet. Proving that the dad-bod is, in fact, not a thing.
Take it from this Dad:
And this one. Yes, we know he’s not a father.
Is it too much of a coincidence that both these men are sitting on a rock wearing nothing but trousers? Do they have a Hotties Over 40 club where they decide how to lure unsuspecting ogglers on Instagram? Clearly.
Like a symposium, but they decide which pictures will parch their followers the most. A SymPOSEum, if you will. And you will, because at this point, we are too dehydrated to argue.
Their club obviously has rules. Like whenever near a body of water, one better be shirtless.
Rahul Khanna is very serious about this one.
Dino plays along too.
Farhan broke the rule once, and Rahul had to show him again.
We’re pretty sure you can leave your hat on though:
But even with all the thirst-trapping, they’ve managed to maintain their individual identities. So that you can pick your daddy issues and run with them. There’s something for everyone.
Dino Morea plays to the bad-boy, bike-riding, gym selfie-taking, football-kicking school of hotties. He’s basically testosterone wrapped in muscle.
Seriously, he pulls out all the big guns… like he has a choice
Farhan Akhtar has the brooding rockstar thing going for him.
The last time you wanted to be a mic this badly was during Enrique’s India tour.
You just know Farhan’s the type of guy who lies around shirtless in glasses, writing poems about his feelings, which you’ll one day get around to reading but those abs are just such a distraction.
Then there’s Rahul Khanna. Thirst trap extraordinaire. If Instagram were Monopoly, Rahul would own all the property and wear a top hat and a monocle. Like a sexy Monopoly Man
Rahul wear scarves and makes low-fat hot cocoa. He reads, but only leather-bound books.
And for the amount he travels, not once has his shampoo spilt in his suitcase because he’s just full of handy travel hacks.
One would question how these men transformed themselves from thirstlings to full-grown thirst timber. Not a red car in sight. Clearly vehicles are not necessary for the transformation of a mid-life crisis because these lads are in their Optimus Prime.