And we are back. Demurely though, not with a bang this time, for it is the season of being very demure, very mindful. Now if your social media habits and screen time falls into the ‘questionable’ slab, there’s no doubt you’ve been bombarded by meta references around being very demure, very mindful. So, how did this modern lingo catastrophe befall thou, humble internet user? And is there potential for it to blossom as the next big thing or is it a fad, soon to be replaced by a meatier, slightly more contentious one? Let’s see.
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It all started when Jools Lebron, a content creator posted a video telling her followers how to appear very demure, very mindful in a variety of real-life scenarios. “You see how I do my makeup for work? Very demure. Very mindful. I don’t come to work with a green-cut crease. I don’t look like a clown when I go to work. I don’t do too much. I’m very mindful while I’m at work. You see how I look very presentable? The way I came to the interview is the way I go to the job. A lot of you girls go to the interview looking like Marge Simpson and go to the job looking like Patty and Selma. Not demure. I’m very modest. I’m very mindful.”
Now what, why and how, would be an understandable enough reaction from a reader, because same. I’m not sure as to how this modesty pedestalising brigade suddenly resurrected itself (from the 1800s probably) but that being said, I do believe Jools also meant this in a lighter manner. She’s no far-right, moral-policing aunt with a dated agenda in mind. She was, in her words, being ‘very demure, very mindful and very cutesy.’
What’s of note here, is her personal trans journey and her very own definition of the word ‘demure,’ that is integral to her identity and how she wishes for it to come off, for others. What I’m stressing on in this case, is the unforeseen scaling of something so very trivial at the start, into well, a booming phenomenon for most mortals with an internet connection.
What Now?
It also in a way, parodies the fascination that Gen Z has with silent luxury, a trend in which riches are flaunted with a whisper rather than a scream. I googled very demure, very mindful (for research purposes) and was greeted with a fashion laced perspective by a fellow magazine. The basis of which was of course, modesty and minimalism. It displayed a ‘classy’ attitude towards clothing, emphasising modest, timeless outfits that radiate grace and sophistication.
Has privilege somehow entered the chat here? Interesting. Sleek capris, in. Pyjamas, out. String of pearls, in. Chunky chokers, out. Throw out your 2024 fashion forecast Bible, this internet trend sure possesses the power to dethrone certain trends, looking at its sharp ascent.
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The Dark Side?
Throughout the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries, the word ‘demure’ was used to characterise hypocrites or people who were ‘hiding a darker version of themselves.’ I saw a meme that essentially tried to establish Carrie Bradshaw’s ‘very demure, very mindful’ habit of refusing to smoke in front of Aidan, a love interest and rather sneaked into the balcony to do the same. Charlotte York on the other hand, an ideal candidate to fit into this mandate given her soft, adaptive and well, slightly old-school ideals.
So, are we packaging conscience-stricken, shamefaced patterns as something that’s cutesy and branding it as superior? The memes sure point to that. Well not me, but a lot of the folks on internet are, unknowingly. Someone give them a cent or two about slang exhaustion, please. Only good thing to come out for this, for writers is that they don’t have to rack their brains over what to write on a given day. These chronically online girlies just do the job for us, as we will dissect a new term every other week. Thanks for that, I guess?
