I’ve held the ‘girlfriend’ title for roughly two years now. I wouldn’t call myself a veteran, but I have a trick or two up my sleeve worth hearing. While being in a relationship has many perks – love, attention, and all that, the biggest perk is access to a complete second wardrobe.
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My boyfriend loves me (on most days) until I steal the Givenchy sweatshirt he bought himself. He sees it on my Instagram as a distant reminder of all he has lost in our relationship. I hardly understand why men complain about this, though. Isn’t our cuteness justification enough for our thievery?
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Aside from the obvious, we have many reasons for our criminal behaviour and I would like to apologise in advance to all the women out there, for I am about to get super real on why we steal our boyfriend’s clothes.
1. Comfort (Duh!)
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Relationships are supposed to be about comfort and feeling at home. So, if his giant T-shirt helps me feel more comfortable in our relationship, of course, I will steal and wear it. Comfort is quite an obvious reason, we like oversized clothes – they’re easier than anything our wardrobe usually has and let our bodies breathe away from scrutiny.
My boyfriend likes to play sweatshirt roulette. He takes the sweatshirt he wants to wear from my wardrobe and slyly replaces it with another one from his wardrobe. On most days, he asks me if he can wear his own clothes! (a trained man, I must say).
2. Olfactory Reasons
I am what one might call a possessive girlfriend, and I love it when my perfume is all over him. What better way for me to ensure that? Once in a while, I like to return a t-shirt or hoodie (give the guy a bone, am I right?) and I spray it with my perfume so that when he walks around town or hits the gym, everyone knows I exist.
3. Girl Math
If he will buy all these large clothes, we don’t have to. We’re being financially savvy when we wear their clothes. Follow me for more such financial tips.
4. Territory Marking
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You know that girl who goes to his gym and keeps making eyes at him? Jokes on her because I just walked in wearing his whole wardrobe. When I wear his clothes, it’s pretty apparent that I’m the only woman he has eyes for. Men are oblivious (as we all know), and I like to mark my territory by wearing his clothes in public. Most days, he doesn’t even realise I’m doing it (bless his heart).
5. Massive Pockets Advantage
Yes, we like our handbags and will probably keep them all forever, but on some days, we don’t want to carry that shoulder bag that hinders our movement or the clutch that keeps one hand occupied all night. On such days, we wish we had access to pants that have pockets, not fake stitched-up pockets for show.
Men’s cargo pants have six pockets at minimum, and they’re massive – they can hold make-up, phones, and all the extra stuff I carry that I rarely need, and miraculously keep my hands free the whole night. It’s no wonder that we women like to wear men’s pants. If you have a boyfriend, it’s just easy access. Who wouldn’t take the chance?
6. The layering opportunities (I’m just a fashion girlie)
Men’s clothes are every fashion girlie’s dream. My boyfriend’s closet has linen shirts, pants, cool bomber jackets, and oversized blazers. You name it, and it’s there. Styling is basically layering to me, and having access to his closet enables me to tickle all my styling brain cells.
On vacation, I always eye his shirts. When he wears a new outfit for date night, my mind starts pairing my closet with his like a mathematical equation. It’s simple, really. I see potential where he sees cloth.
