“Is that the programme with loads of sex and dragons?” is a question quite commonly levelled at Game of Thrones fans. After all, since the hit HBO show first graced our screens in 2011, it’s continuously been mired in controversy for showing, arguably, some of the most contentious sex and nudity scenes on television ever.
Cries of ‘rape porn’ and concerns about the fetishisation of female assault has resulted in a lot of backlash and uncomfortable internal conflicts for the series’ fans and feminists.
This show is consistently over-the-top with sexual violence and it’s just gross. #GoT
— Jessica Valenti (@JessicaValenti) May 18, 2015
You only need to think back to the first time Khal Drogo and Daenerys Targaryen had somewhat animalistic sex on their wedding night, that time Sophie Turner’s character Sansa Stark was horrendously raped by Ramsay Bolton, when Cersei Lannister was forced to walk naked through the streets of King’s Landing, and the shocking, coercive moment when Jaime Lannister forced himself on sister Cersei in front of their dead son.
Light relief, Game of Thrones is not.
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However, last night Games of Thrones did something quite unprecedented.
*If you don’t want a spoiler, look away now.*
During the second episode of Season 7, ‘Stormborn’ – after years of relentless flirting between Grey Worm (played by Jacob Anderson) and Missandei’s (Nathalie Emmanuel) – the two most dedicated members of Daenerys’ Queensguard finally ‘got it on’.
And no, their sex scene wasn’t gratuitous, unnecessarily graphic, or sexually violent, but a tender, empowering moment between two of the most adorable members of the series, whose relationship has frequently been tested due to Grey Worm’s body insecurities (he’s castrated, FYI) and their duty to the Queen.
The moment finally came about in last night’s episode when Missandei finally found the courage to tell Grey Worm – who is currently gearing up to fight in Daenerys’s war against Cersei – how she feels, and demands for him to be honest with his feelings for her.
With Grey Worm revealing Missandei is his ‘weakness’, the former slaves kiss, disrobe and finally had sex, taking ownership and power of their bodies that have so long been dictated by propriety, slavery, honour and duty.
Even when Grey Worm tries to cover himself up, ashamed at being a eunuch (a castrated man), his lover reassures him she wants to see all of his body.
Of course, this isn’t the first time in Game of Thrones when we’ve seen characters enjoy a tender and consensual sexual experience.
Fans will fondly remember the moment when Daenerys Targaryen finally took ownership of her body in Season 1, teaching her husband Khal Drogo how they can both enjoy sex, without him needing to treat her like a horse.
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There was also that time when wildling Ygritte took Ned Stark’s bastard son Jon Snow’s virginity in a cave, resulting in him breaking his Night’s Watch vows and falling in love with the girl ‘beyond the wall’.
However, it’s important to remember that these arguably tender sexual moments mostly came about out of lust, with one or both of the partners asserting a form of power over the other (Snow was related to royalty while Ygritte boasted no hereditary political authority, meanwhile Drogo was a warrior leader, while Daenerys was sold to him to be his wife).
Missandei and Grey Worm, on the other hand, are equals – both former slaves and dutiful to their Queen, Daenerys– with their relationship founded first on friendship and respect for each other’s honour, not a battle for power and pleasure.
Also, you can’t ignore the fact this is the first time the show has shown a non-white couple enjoying an intimate moment together, amid controversy of its lack of diversity throughout the film industry.
With sex so often being used as a form of power play, assertion of authority and violence in Game of Thones, it’s refreshing to see the show finally celebrate the care, trust and love of intimacy in sex.
From: ELLE UK
