What If the Real Jump Scare… Is Love?

Imagine this: 3 A.M., peak witching hour. You’re lying in bed, staring at the ceiling. The room is quiet, alive with something unseen. The shadows on the walls stretch and shift, and every nerve in your body whispers that you’re not alone. A chill crawls up your spine, a presence lingering just beyond the edge of your vision. You know the rule: never look when fear coils around you.

But the protagonist in you knows this isn’t the beginning of a real horror story unless you face it. So you turn. And what do you see? It’s love.

Yes, love. And before you scoff, put down that sigh. This isn’t the kind of love that comes with hearts and roses. This is scarier than the ghosts hiding under your bed, the kind that seeps into your brain and won’t let go.

“Be With Someone Who Loves You, Not Who You Love.”

That’s what my grandmother said when I asked her how to choose a man. It sounds simple, but there’s something terrifyingly true about it. You feel more wanted, desired, cherished when the other person is the one doing the loving. And who doesn’t want to be on the receiving end of that?

Being with someone who loves you means choosing a partner who actively values, respects, and prioritises you. It’s not about how intensely you feel for someone; it’s about whether your intensity is returned.

But here’s the truth: humans are wired to crave this validation. When someone truly loves us, our brain releases oxytocin and dopamine,  a rush that feels safe, euphoric, and almost intoxicating. But one-sided love? That’s a trap. Your mind keeps chasing a high that never arrives consistently, leaving you anxious, restless, and strangely addicted. Loving someone doesn’t guarantee happiness, but being loved usually does. And yes, that is the spine-chilling truth.

Validation Vs Desire

There’s a subtle difference between genuinely desiring someone and craving the thrill of being desired. The latter strokes your self-esteem more than reciprocating feelings ever could.

Modern dating is the perfect playground for this obsession. Every notification, every double-tap becomes a tiny thrill, a validation hit that your brain chases.

• Texting Games: Waiting for a reply. Refreshing your notifications. Heart racing at the thought of a single 'seen' or 'typing…' bubble. Each tiny acknowledgement feels like survival, like being chosen in a world full of shadows.

• Situationships: It’s not love; it’s the thrill of the chase. Emotionally unavailable partners create a tension that keeps your brain on edge, craving approval, obsessing over every fleeting sign that you matter. The highs are intoxicating, the lows are sharp, but you keep going, addicted to the pattern, haunted by the uncertainty.

• The Parallels: It’s not always about the person themselves, but the status, the rarity, the chase. Being wanted becomes a badge, proof that you’re desirable, enviable, untouchable, and your ego, not your heart, is the one falling.

The scary part in all of this? Most of us don’t even notice when we’re chasing validation instead of love.

The Haunted Heart

Tied to attachment theory and past emotional instability, our brains crave extremes. The thrill of being desired is like a shadow whispering from an alley: impossible to ignore. My soul screamed, 'Don’t go forward, Diya. Turn back!' Yet I kept walking, even as every instinct shouted to run, because the fear itself was addictive.

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And that, dear reader, is what I’ve learned about love: it’s not always the one you chase that haunts you. Sometimes it’s the one who chooses you, and the terror of realising just how deeply you need to be chosen. Like the best horror stories, it leaves you breathless, haunted, and unable to look away.

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