In most contexts, masturbation translates to solo pleasure. I’ve always thought of it as an activity that I do with myself, to get to know my body better. After all, nothing ever beats an evening with my trusted vibrators, sometimes not even partnered sex. However, my longstanding opinion on this shifted a tad bit when I introduced mutual masturbation into my life.
What Is Mutual Masturbation?
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As the name suggests, mutual masturbation is the act of pleasuring yourself alongside a partner or partners. This could either mean you and your partner are masturbating simultaneously, or even taking turns—whatever works comfortably for the both of you, or all of you. Yep, mutual masturbation could also be a group activity, as weird as it may sound.
One could rely on using their hands or turn to their trusted repertoire of sex toys. Both of which could have quite fruitful results. While orgasms may be something we always enjoy, they don’t have to be the end goal of everything. Sometimes, the idea is just to lay back and have a little fun.
Is There Any Good To Mutually Masturbate With Your Partner?
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Now, I’m certain that even the idea of broaching the topic of mutual masturbation with your partner can prove to be quite an awkward and intimidating one. I remember bringing it up with a previous partner and feeling extremely nervous, but to my surprise, this partner was delighted I brought it up. While initially, I felt discomfort by bringing someone into my vulnerable space of self-pleasure, this act that’s almost voyeuristic in nature, took down walls and allowed us our connection to deepen.
We’ve already established that it’s never a bad idea to spice up your shenanigans in the bedroom by exploring new activities. Mutual masturbation is right up there. It’s the perfect way to experience pleasure by taking off the pressure oral sex often gets along with it.
Mutual masturbation is also a great way to introduce outercourse into your sexual routine, especially if penetrative sex is not something you and your partner enjoy. By doing this, one also gets to see the techniques that turn their partner on and take notes on it. Additionally, if you’ve been looking for a way to give your partner a lesson or two on how to touch you, this is the secret to doing that.
Ways To Introduce Mutual Masturbation Into Your Routine
The stepping stone to introducing any sexual act into your life is by having an open conversation with your partner about what makes the both of you feel comfortable. Once you’ve both expressed your healthy consent and interest in engaging in mutual masturbation, it’s crucial to discuss a few details too. For instance, I asked a previous partner how they would feel about me masturbating with my pulsating vibrator, and they were ecstatic about it.
After this, pinpointing a place where you’re going to do this would be the next step. Sexual activities don’t always need to take place in the bedroom, duh! The living room, bathroom or even just a car are great places to start. Next, setting the mood is absolutely crucial when it comes to mutual masturbation since it can prove to be daunting. Dim lights and an aphrodisiac candle with some sensual music were factors that worked well for me. After making yourself comfortable in the mood of your choice, the next step would be to get some dirty talk into the mix, a practice I believe always does the trick.
Just a simple, “You look so hot when you look at me like that” goes a long way. For first-timers, it’s best to agree on positions that allow you to have a full-frontal view of your partner while masturbating together. Whether an orgasm is your end goal or not, the idea of mutual masturbation is to allow you and your partner to uncover facets of pleasure that were always hidden.
