Tired Of Swiping Right? You’re Not Alone

Gone case. Nauseating. Awful. The total of my single friends, both actively dating and those one day in, the other day out, often put the aforementioned verbiage to use (many at times wrapped around expletives) when discussing the whole ordeal. Apparently, no one is having a good time in the dating market. Right swiping has now taken on a chore-like connotation—the excitement over a match and the thrilling conversation that would otherwise ensue has been seeing a wretched decline overall. So, what is up?

It hit me, aka an ex-app survivor (I met my guy there almost three years ago), a couple of nights ago, when on video call with my long-distance friend in the UK, visibly distraught and sounding done with it all. ‘It’s just not worth it, Ipsita,’ she exclaimed. She hinted at a collective weariness that engulfed her, with a free accompaniment of nonchalance. ‘Flirty texts don’t hit the spot anymore. People don’t have the bandwidth anymore.’ Exhilarating? Not anymore. Funnily enough, the paradox at the heart of it all is that while we’re more connected than ever, genuine connection feels increasingly elusive. 

It’s like binge-watching a TV series—the first few episodes are exciting, the middle bit drags, and by the end, you’re questioning why you’re still watching in the first place. And yet, just like any good binge-watch, we keep returning for more. Ghosting and catfishing have only amplified the problem. How can you trust anyone when you’ve been left on read for the 15th time, or worse, been lured into a conversation with someone who doesn’t even exist? And let’s not get started on the crushing weight of rejection. It always doesn’t have to come in the form of a failed date—the constant, numbing form of rejection embedded within the app's very structure is itself doomed. You could be the most interesting person in the world, but a bad picture or the wrong timing can (and WILL) turn your entire profile into the digital equivalent of a wet sock. I’m tired just thinking about it—glad to be out of it all.

Radhika Rane, my batchmate from high school, who is, to quite an extent, battling some pressure to get married, told me, “We’ve been told for years to settle, to be patient and to take what we’re given. But not anymore. If I’m going to invest my time in someone, they need to meet me at my level. Dating apps can be a minefield, but I’m learning to trust myself more and go at my own pace. Enough of chatting with losers dropping ‘wyds’ every night. If I meet someone great, I meet them; if not, I’m good.” Bravo. No more playing nice just to get a second date, no more accommodating mediocrity. Women have started refusing anything less than what they deserve—point blank.

“It might sound cliché, but I used to think dating apps were the answer. And after a while, it felt more like a job than a chance to meet someone. Now, I’d rather focus on the friendships I’ve built offline.”

- Janhvi Somaya, full-time analyst and crochet hobbyist

The jarring truth isn’t hidden—it echoes the consumer culture we've been thrust into, every second of the day. Shopping for love is dissatisfying. No wonder it’s causing all of that mental and emotional fatigue that inevitably follows from pouring all your energy into shallow exchanges. The solution, you ask? It’s pretty simple. Just stop. Take a break. Paint a tree or something. As much as I’m risking the possibility of sounding like a cringe mindset coach, all I aim to do with this piece is derail this habit of binge swiping. Just uninstall that bad boy (pun intended) for a while. 

And trust me, taking a break is not a sign of defeat—rediscovering what really matters is quite cool, actually. Go ahead and recalibrate your dating expectations—you’ll be surprised how homogenised (and one-track-minded) your reservations have been. Focusing on self-care, or simply taking time to enjoy the journey, sometimes a break from the app chaos can be just what you need. Dating burnout might feel overwhelming, but it’s not permanent. See ya on the other side!

Also Read: 

What’s A Humiliationship? And Are You In One?

Modern Love: Why Is Dating So Intimidating?