Yap-Trapping: When Your Date Needs To Be Taught The Importance Of Shutting The F*ck Up

Yapping and trapping. Lo and behold, for we have a new term in the dating market. One targeted at those with mouths functioning overtime and a regard for decency in the minus. Meet the yap-trappers, they’ll talk, and then talk some more. They’re still talking, for all you know.

What It's About 

Nanoships and benching are a thing of the past, this new headache is a dating hot potato that leads to strained relationships, taking the easy way out and sometimes…ghosting. Welp. Not that I condone the act, but some dates need a ‘reality check.’ Something rather harsh. A friend of mine, who wants to remain anonymous, was seeing this aspiring model/actor guy who had MAJOR issues with listening. “He was stunningly pretty, but completely self-absorbed. He’d never listen—if I said my stomach hurt, he’d never check up on me. Upon mentioning that my dad loves collecting shoes, he’d hop on to talking about his dad’s watch collection–no regard for a follow-up question. No interest at all. He’d shift every conversation back to himself," she stated. He’s not the one, girl. Clearly. 

You think this is infuriating, read more concerning accounts below:

Disha Talreja: “So I went on the date because the guy seemed quite decent at first. He was 20 minutes late, by the way. (RED ALERT). Throughout the date he just kept talking about his business, his life, his dad–papa papa papa x 100. At one point he was telling me how much his family spent on his sister’s wedding and how his brother-in-law is Amitabh Bachchan's neighbour. And towards the end tells me that his family will only get him married to another chick, so he suggested we be friends with benefits.” Mic drop. Deafening silence. Profound dumbness. That’s all. Oh yes, the audacity.

Chiranshaa: "Had a first call with a model who went on about his diet and schedule the entire time."

Krishika: "Went out with a guy who couldn’t stop talking about himself. He’d say, ‘Do not interrupt me when I’m having an intelligent conversation,’ even though no one was interrupting. His ‘intelligent conversation’ was just him spouting jargon and politics."

Kabir (name changed): "The guy wouldn’t stop talking, especially in awkward places. He tried to impress the Soho House receptionist by talking about memberships, even though we’d just booked an Uber economy ride right in front of her." LOL.

Kareena Vinaik: "Dated a guy for six months who couldn't stop talking about his AC business, even at 1 AM. I knew more about ACs than about him."

Akshu: "Dated a film kid who wouldn’t let me watch movies in peace. Eventually, I just stopped watching films altogether.”

And this is why I say, modern problems can’t always be solved with modern solutions. Modern dating really is a puzzle. It’s completely okay to date a yapper–I’m with one, in fact. But it’s the emotional maturity that makes them ask you about your day after they’re done with their info dump which may have consisted of 300 quips about their day. It’s fine. All you need is some genuine interest. So men, kindly take notes. 

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