Talk about heating things up in the bedroom, literally. When the term BDSM is casually thrown around, we end up presuming that it is limited to activities such as bondage or using fancy toys. However, BDSM includes a lot more than just that. Temperature play is right up there with bondage and dominance/submission. It uses sensations of heat or cold in partnered or solo sex to heighten your experience of feeling pleasure. When you hold a warm cup of coffee, you instantly feel slightly comforted and when you feel the sensation of cold water trickling down your body, there’s an instant jolt. Tapping into these sensations, temperature play is an easy yet thrilling way to introduce something new into your sexual life. Since temperature play is adaptable to your preferences and desires, there’s so much scope to experiment with different sensations, temperatures and things.
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Things to keep in mind before you engage in it
Enthusiastic consent: Enthusiastic consent is the bare minimum when it comes to any sexual activity. It’s imperative to communicate about all of the aspects of temperature play since there is a certain level of risk involved. Talk to your partner about the temperature levels their bodies would be comfortable with along with getting an idea about the materials being used too.
A safe word: A safe word is a designated word that is used to revoke consent amid a sexual activity. It’s used when you feel like withdrawing participation from any act, even kissing.
Conduct enough research about items being used: Temperature play involves the use of props and sometimes even food items. Before you try out anything with your partner, read about the items that you’re going to be using. For instance, food items contain certain ingredients that could cause allergic reactions when applied to intimate areas of the body.
Be careful of your surroundings: Once again, when props are being used it’s important to be cognizant of the surroundings you’re in. If you’re choosing to engage in temperature play with fire, hot wax or any flammable item—stay away from cloth items that could easily heat up or catch fire.
Ways you can use heat to spice things up
Massage oils: The easiest way to try your hands at hot temperature play would be by introducing heated massage oils into your sexual routine. Sensual massages are always a steamy outercourse practice. Heat your usual massage oil to a comfortable temperature for your partner or opt for massage candles like MyMuse’s Melt Massage Candle which melts into fragrant massage oils when heated.
Wax play: Wax play has been a hot favourite in the kink universe for quite some time now. It involves using candles to let hot wax drip on the erogenous zones of your body, turning the heat up, quite literally. Remember to stay away from regular candles if you engage in wax play since these can burn the skin. Opt for special sex candles like imBesharam’s Kama Sutra Ignite Massage Candle that melts wax safely on the skin. These candles burn at significantly lower temperatures and are made with safe ingredients for the skin.
Ways you can use cold to spice things up
Engage in ice play: Probably the easiest prop to utilise, ice is known to elicit responses that turn you on. Places like the nape of your neck, the inner thigh and your breasts are sure to be perfect for some targeted stimulation. It’s even better when you’re tracing the ice cube on your partner’s body with your mouth since the combination of your warm mouth and the chilled ice cube can be quite the steamy experience.
Try out cold food: While opinions may be divided when it comes to using edible items in the bedroom owing to hygiene purposes, there’s always fun to be had when you’re being cautious. Food items like chilled whipped cream or ice cream can be used everywhere except the vaginal area for a titillating experience.
Chill your sex toys: This applies only to sex toys that are made of steel and glass. Butt plugs and dildos made from these materials can be put in the fridge to chill them out and be used. The Drive Me Crazy Glass Massage Wand from Love Depot is made with borosilicate glass which can be cooled for increasing pleasure.
