Cliterally Speaking: Addressing Orgasm Gaps

Clit oral orgasms

In 2023, we’re romanticising the little moments of our lives, manifesting healthy boundaries and toe-curling orgasms. So can we talk about sex and how the female orgasm is still not a priority in an act of love- making? And a direct contributor to this gap is the lack of quality and comprehensive sex education which prioritises female pleasure. MyMuse’s co-founder Anushka Gupta believes, “Education that focuses solely on female pleasure and agency is what will pave the way for an enriching sex life for every individual involved.” MyMuse is a bedroom essentials wellness brand on a mission to make intimacy easy.

While penetrative stimulation is still thought to be the only way to orgasm, the clitoris is the pleasure nub that’s often ignored. A 2015 study conducted by The Journal Of Sex and Marital Therapy, United States of America revealed that a whopping 36.6 per cent of women deem clitoral stimulation a necessity to orgasm, while another 26 per cent disclosed that their orgasms feel much better when clitoral stimulation is involved. Tanisha RK, Chief of Social Voice at Sangya Project, explains further. “Penetrative play can feel overwhelming to some, and the positions you choose often play a massive role in how you experience pleasure. With the clitoris, the sensitivity is often so high, you can explore more forms of contact and positions that lead to a climax.”

Experts unanimously agree that the clitoris is a primary source of pleasure for females. Intimacy and sexuality coach Pallavi Barnwal explains, “The primary reason why self-pleasure is so orgasmic is all because it emphasises stimulating the external genitals, which include the clitoris with the inner lips, outer lips, mons and the vaginal canal too.” Since lubrication of the vagina doesn’t happen with ease for everyone, clitoral stimulation offers an easier pathway to it. “The 8,000 nerve endings of the clitoris ensure a strong signalling to the body for increasing blood flow to the genital area, which in turn leads to an increase in lubrication and sexual responsiveness,” Tanisha adds.

If you’re thinking of experimenting with sex toys, keep in mind that since this region of your body is highly sensitive, it’s wise to use hands and water- based lubricant before introducing toys for the experience. Tanisha explains, “Gently move your fingertips, or the toy, in slow circular motions around the clitoris but not directly on it, to slowly build up the excitement.” With that, oral sex and slow movements of the body against the clitoris can help build the excitement leading to pleasure. Gupta sums it up for us, “With all things sexual, there’s a learning curve and no specific way to reach the climax. Exploring and experimenting with your body is the key to understanding what brings you pleasure.”

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